Business Recovery

Business Recovery in laments terms

Who let the dogs out? BULLYING

Introduction

You can go a long way in business, build up your clientele and form good relationships for a long period.  For me it was 8 years.  8 years of trust built up.  8 years of people liking us.  A heaven that I loved.  Debt free.  I came from a caring background and to be caring for the clients in my work gave me much pleasure.

I thought I was smart, after all, I had a beautiful family and a thriving business over such a long period of time.  My heart was always in the right place.  I worked very hard to earn what I got, often giving so much of my time to so many from the heart and the respect that came with it. Life was a dream, an ocean of plenty, a time to live gracefully after all the hard work. Respect is what we both had plenty of.

6 months prior to my mother’s passing there was things happening in the business that were not right.  Follow your gut instinct is one thing I neglected.

On January the 7th 2013 my mother passed after a long term illness of over 10 years. Before she passed I visited her as much as I possibly could.

At the same time my father was in hospital and my husband was diagnosed with a terminal illness.

My emotions were at a real low but I thought I could keep going. Wrong!

I lost my bearings, so to speak. I trusted where I should not have and took my eye off the ball.

I lost much of my hard earned respect.

One day the bottom fell out.  Right out of my beautiful Ocean of paradise.  The Ocean that I had nurtured for so very long.  The Ocean that my husband worked night shifts in the initial stages to support me with our goals and dreams.

When I say bottom, I mean bottom. It was like a pile of cards falling over fast and furious or tangled reeves murking at sea level.

One might call it a very big kick in the ass.  For the sake of our kind trusting hearts.  And then I would suffer immensely as to why?

It took me a whole year of therapy to finally let go of “the whys”?

BULLYING

I was targeted by bullies.  3 men and several woman while my family was on it’s death bed.  

MONEY TALKS AND GREED WILL PREVAIL, TRUST ME,  BULLIES SHOW NO REMORSE AND HAMMER THEIR VICTIMS.  STAND UP AND DON’T BE A VICTIM.

It was all about money and I and my dying family or our business were all just reeves of muck to them to be disposed of and tortured endlessly.

But even to date, the hurt, pain and agony of the torturous pre-meditated angry harassment and violation of my rights still continues and haunts me. I felt like a reeve in the ocean.

Yes, it wasn’t just the losses of family and much of my business livli-hood I endured.

A woman in business is easy prey.  And to be easy prey to not only one man but three.  Three men against one woman with a dying husband.  Don’t seem fair does it?

But that is how it was for me.  And just because you yourself have care and empathy happening don’t expect a bully to show the same feelings, as bullies are ruthless.

I eventually lost my dear husband in July 2015.  He was a man who loved people, his family and loved me so very much.  I guess I thought that all men were good and protective to women. Well the ones in my life I thought all were.  Wrong!

I knew that I was never going to let any bullies bring me down.

For I am competition and I should remain my friends and family would say.  I have not given in to these bullies.

I fought so hard that my tears were rolling down my face days when my dying husband asked me if I was ready yet.  Ready for a little outing I planned for him, whether it was the beach, dinner or the movies as we could not afford much.  I was mostly always trying to work to pay for the horrendous damage and keep our livli-hood. Couldn’t plan much, although these times were very important for him.  I was mostly late getting off my computer, unless I worked over 12 hours a day to catch up.

I tossed over ideas of giving up and giving in, as I knew the torture and harassment may stop only if I did resign from the business world.

I also felt the bills would stop if I did give up too. But the debts kept me going as I was determined to pay them all, every single one.

I prayed to God often.  And it was for the love of my family and friends I stayed strong.

I developed this eBook from a learning experience to assist others to beat the dogs in business.

Rules of the game: KNOW HOW TO PLAY THE GAME FIRST.

Whether you are a woman or a man the same applies.

  1. EMOTION Keep as much emotion of business as you can. Sure, you might make friends, I have made many. But there are snakes out there and you will get bitten.
  2. Gut instinct. Why do we have it? Well its usually right, so use it..
  3. FRIENDS If you are a bit naïve and bit too kind listen to your friends who aren’t so naïve. If several of them warn you of a bad egg then they are probably right.
  4. TRUST; If someone begs you to trust them. It may be just a show to penetrate your gut instinct. Why would they beg? Have you indicated a sense of mis-trust to them and they need to get your assurance.
  5. SHUT UP SHOP; If you have a lot of turmoil in your life it may be a wiser move to just shut up shop until the coast is clear again. Or should I say head.
  6. COURT ORDER: A woman should seek out court orders very early at any sign of harassment. Don’t try and be nice and ask politely by phone or email to be left alone. You won’t get a reply, trust me.  If someone is out to get you they will hold down to the last grind. Get the police involved.
  7. PEOPLE AND MONEY; People will be angry if you owe them money. They don’t give a rats ass if you don’t have any. They will go at you like a bull at a gate.  If your really unlucky some will torture the living daylights out of you any way possible. But you will get some that are very patient and easy to work with.  Look after the patient ones first to show your appreciation.
  8. Go solo for a while until you get back on your feet again. You did it in the beginning so you can for sure do it again. You are a lot wiser and have more experience now so it’s easier to get the ball rolling again.
  9. GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE; Don’t be too proud to ask for government assistance. You need it so go for it. They will tell what to do and will work out your entitlements correctly.
  10. HEALTH; With all this going on your health may suffer. Get help and do look after your health. Taking care of your health and eating right is giving your body the right fuel and some maintenance to give your mind the strength it needs.
  11. JUSTIFICATION; Don‘t try and justify yourself or your actions to anyone, ever. There is no poverty like ignorance. And believe me, some people are pretty stupid and very ignorant. Some people can be easily manipulated and brain washed.  Some of the most intelligent people in the world have been in cults, allowing them to be brainwashed and manipulated to be, act and do some very horrible things.  When they finally reach a point of saying no or getting their wake-up call, they come out of a very dark hole to a very rude awakening.
  12. REACH FOR THE HIGHEST MOUNTAIN: With all the negativity and drama happening you may need a bit of a pick me up. Surround yourself with positive people. Read success stories and books of successful people to create a positive dome of protection around you. Do what you do best, keep learning and hold your head up high. You’re never too old to learn and grow in your business.
  13. BANKRUPTCY: Gives you a chance to start over again. It seems like your getting out of your commitments. But in all honesty if you cannot pay, then that’s it. Don’t put off the inevitable. You need to eat and pay your rent. Your health may suffer if you burn yourself out trying to maintain what debt you have.
  14. LOYALTY: Many people still pay their debts once on their feet.  Choose carefully if you want to pay and who you want to pay first.  But the law says you don’t have to pay at all.  You need to make sure that you can look after yourself first.  Rent and Food first. Publish your intentions.

There are many good books out there that can help you get things back into perspective.

When they say: What doesn’t kill me will make me strong.  It’s true to a degree.

THE ABILITY TO SET GOALS AND FOLLOW A PLAN TO ACHIEVE THEM

So many people don’t think about specific goals – they just think about wants or wishes. “I want to make more money.”  “I wish I could lose weight.” These are all very common desires. Unfortunately, these thoughts alone will not lead to successful results.

By defining goals that are tightly tied to your values and your personal dreams, you make a powerful start on the path to happiness and success.  But, knowing what you want is just the first of two critical steps in getting what you want.  Having a plan that keeps you focused on your goals, instead of simply setting and forgetting them is the key.

Make sure you set highly personal goals. Then back them up with a proven and structured process.

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